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Whenever you feel down about yourself, remember Dr. Lister, who was an esteemed early surgeon.... And also did a surgery that had a 300% mortality rate.

Has your fanfic resulted in a 300% mortality rate? No? Then you're doing better than Dr Lister! Be proud!

(How do you do a surgery with said mortality rate? Well this is pre anesthesia so he was of the Gotta Go Fast surgery school. He performed an amputation where the patient died. And he sawed so fast he also got his assistant's fingers, and said assistant later died due to infection. And one of the audience watching the surgery was so horrified by this that he keeled over dead of a heart attack.

Dr Lister everybody!)

@wigglytuffitout the fuck do you mean 300% mortality?
Did every attempt also kill 2 assistants???

@rockario his other famous surgery was the time record for a leg amputation (I forget the time, 3 mins or so I think?)

Except he did that so quick he also cut the dude's balls clean off in the process

Not a measure twice cut once kind of guy, Dr Lister

@hoppet horramused is the vibe for much of medical history tbh

@[email protected] @[email protected] That's a not too uncommon feeling listening to episodes of Sawbones. "Wait, wait, they thought what was a good idea‽"

@wigglytuffitout I mean I'd probably rather have him than the slow unasthetitized amputation

@cuttlefish tbh given his uh showmanship and how he'd go thru as many patients as possible without washing his coat, or hands, or anything....

...you would probably be better off with someone going slow lol

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