"Math? In /my/ D&D game? It's more likely than you think!"
"Kobold powered trebuchet."
"So you pull out the battleaxe that for 37 sessions you were only carrying around for aesthetic reasons."
"It is the worst of hugs. No one is a fan of this hug."
"Sewage elemental! Sewage elemental! Sewage elemental!"
"The DM will simultaneously allow this and have concerns."
"For some reason you see the somersault from multiple camera angles."
"You hear a muffled explosion, a cry of 'Please don't kill me,' ..."
"An /aggressive/ cry of 'Please don't kill me.'"
"How do you feel about being poisoned?"
"Angry."
"Well, good news is that you're raging."
"What happens when you put a tiny amount of fire in a septic tank?"
"A barbarian made a wisdom saving throw, then jumped into the pit anyway."
"Absorb elements?"
"Absorb elements poo?"
"No, that comment was off the rails. You're assuming we're getting back on them."
"And if there isn't enough water I can keep adding water until there's enough water for it to count as water for magical purposes."
"It's a hereditary position."
"There's ways to solve that."
"No!"
"I'm not gonna do that ... yet."
"The plumbing crew are all building lead zeppelins."
"Oh, they're all bards."
"Oh no! ...Oh, wait, that's probably a good thing."
"You make me spit-take, you get Inspiration."
"So you're saying we shouldn't investigate the very dangerous area because there's nothing of interest and oh by the way it's 100% safe."
"That's right, it's tougher than me."
"Tinker! And also make ship repairs. Not at the same time."
"I have a Prestidigitation Tool Kit! I've invented White-Out!"
"I'd like to use Enhance Ability ... I'd like to use my Inspiration ... I'd like to use my Luck Point ... I'm going to use Flash of Genius ..."
Call me Crash.
I'm a teacher, Social Justice Paladin, DM for a #DnD #Podcast, & widower.
he/him
Not actually a kobold. Or a tiefling. Or a hexagon.
Avatars may change, but many of mine are by @scoots!